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I have finally come to the conclusion that the Ghana Highway Code of 1974 is a bit of a joke in Accra today-and that is an understatement. The experience of driving on Accra roads is now different from what the rules say in that document, so here is my civic duty for the month. I will attempt to describe a dozen of the new �rules�, since they reflect exactly what happens these days on Accra roads. If you are not the Artful Dodger, don�t try to dodge potholes. You may end up causing an accident, and be liable for it. So, get familiar with potholes. Fall squarely (or roundly) into them, damage your shock absorbers and ultimately, enrich the Abossey Okai spare parts dealers some more. When making a left 90 degree turn at a junction, don�t turn 90 degrees at the turn. Just turn in a diagonal sort of fashion, veering into the oncoming lane (and oncoming cars) before ending up back in your lane. Left turns can seriously delay your trip to wherever you are bound, so avoid them when you can. If you absolutely have to do a left turn, the traffic of passing cars can be so heavy that you would not find a �safe gap� to get into the traffic. But not to worry, the cars behind you will start to honk loudly after 2 seconds, driving your peace of mind out of the window and so you will �force� your way forward and go. Alternatively, the car behind you will just come right past you and zip through, and then you will feel like an idiot for being so cautious. With right turns, you can just forget the �safe gap� and squeeze in, and the car behind you better have good brakes. If (s)he doesn�t and hits you, it is her fault. In all other cases, you can cut in front of other cars, and they better have good brakes. If not, the fault is theirs. In an accident with another car, start to argue as hard and loudly as you can to pin the blame on the other driver. Under no circumstances should you try to involve the police because that will lead to a loss of time and money-and that is before you even get round to getting your car fixed. If you knock someone down and the person needs medical attention, your car becomes the ambulance-even if it is a Daewoo Tico or a single cabin pickup truck. Everybody around will be eager to help bundle the person into your vehicle, possibly injuring the person further but you better appreciate the �help�. If you are so unfortunate to knock down a certified lunatic, he will automatically be deemed to be sane from that point on, and his family will descend on you to claim �compensation� for the terrible thing you have done to their beloved. Road markings are rare because they wear out fast, so following them is rather pointless. Where there is enough width on the road, you can turn a one lane road into 2, 3 or 4 parallel lanes of traffic. It makes for more efficient traffic flow��. In a crossroad �tangle�, when no car can go forward, your goal is to insult everybody else and go your way. No reversing should be done, even when you can do it because you are wise and right. No-one else is. Don�t mind them�� If you ride a motorbike, traffic lights don�t apply to you. You can zip right through red lights. No problem. Continue to use your vehicle even if it starts to belch black bilious smoke. All the mechanics and fitter boys can go hang, after all you can�t afford those �overhauling and piston rings� things they are talking about. Nobody will arrest you for generating all that smoke, so why bother? If you have a bicycle, you can ride it on the road, just like it is a car. Any car behind you needs to understand that. Fully. I hope these rules make sense to you, because you will see them on Accra roads. I am yet to find out if this is also the case in other cities in this country. Will report back when I find out���.